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Updated: 08/28/2018 10:58 PM

 

 

 

 

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Please visit http://www.cnyauctions.com/guitars4sale.htm for details & photos!

 

 


08/11/2018 AUCTION NEWS

 

Hi everyone:

 

I hope someone feels really bad for me and will STOP THE INSANITY! Today is the first day in a week that I was able to send out email. I had forgotten my password for godaddy.com. Once I got that going again, I had to change my Outlook password. Several times, whatever I had selected was promptly rejected because I was not allowed to reuse one of my last 5 passwords. I really like to know what comedian came up with that idea! After I carefully set my Outlook, all was well – or so I thought! When I did the test mail, I found out that the outgoing mail refused AGAIN. Does anyone know where I can ‘get courier pigeons? And did you know that, when you can’t remember just one or two password, it won’t take long before others follow suit. Perhaps the heat is responsible for causing brain outages.

 

I received this from Mike O’Hora: Thank you, Mike!
Subject: Racist?

WHAT AISLE IS THE POLISH SAUSAGE IN? Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to scream 'prejudice' these days... 

A customer asked, "In what aisle can I find the Polish sausage?"

The clerk asks, "Are you Polish?" 

The guy, clearly offended, says, "Yes I am. But let me ask you something.

If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian?

Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?

Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?

Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican?

Or if I asked for some Whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?"

The clerk says, "No, I probably wouldn't."

The guy says, "Well then, because I asked for Polish sausage, why did you ask me if I'm Polish?" 

The clerk replied, "Because you're in Ace Hardware."

 

Another THANK YOU for Judy Brown for this:

 

These are better than the Darwin Awards.

 

1. AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked

intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package. 
Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence. Right, AT&T?

2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: 
Police in Oakland, CA spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who 
had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, 
officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police 
line, shouting, 'Please come out and give yourself up.' 

3. *WHAT WAS PLAN B? 
An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced 
him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the 
kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts. 

4. *THE GETAWAY! 
A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop and asked for all the money 
in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the 
store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police 
showed up and grabbed him. 

5. *DID I SAY THAT? 
Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just 
couldn't control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in 
the lineup to repeat the words: 'Give me all your money or I'll shoot', the 
man shouted, 'that's not what I said!' 

6. *ARE WE COMMUNICATING? 
A man spoke frantically into the phone: 'My wife is pregnant and her 
contractions are only two minutes apart'. 'Is this her first child?' the 
doctor asked. 'No!' the man shouted, 'This is her husband!' 

7. *NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED! 
In Modesto, CA, Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a 
Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to 
simulate a gun. Unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket. 
(hellooooooo...!!!) 

8. *THE GRAND FINALE! 
Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert an hour 
east of Bakersfield, CA, some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. 
No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 foot 
boat, going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how 
much power they applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they 
putted into a nearby marina, thinking someone there may be able to tell them 
what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect 
working condition. The engine ran fine, the out-drive went up and down, and 
the propeller was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys 
jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was 
laughing so hard. Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the 
trailer! 

*Now remember, these are all true stories, these people vote and most 
have children!*

 

At the risk of sounding once again like a broken record; please check www.cnyauctions.com for what is coming up in auctions and have  a really grrrreat week!

 

Cheers,

 

Renate

www.cnyauctions.com


 


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